My parents learned survival strategies. They learned to ‘not rock the boat’, to keep quiet and keep your head down low. They believed that it was better to not be seen or heard. Just work hard and follow the rules. They passed these beliefs on to me. While these learnings may have served my parents and all those in their generation, they don’t serve me or the AAPI community any longer.
Meet Amy Yip, a Life Transformation and Mental Fitness coach who works with high-achieving, ambitious women going through transitions to tap into their potential and bridge the gap between where they are now and where they want to be (even if that destination isn’t totally clear yet). Her passion for coaching is to empower people to realize their full potential, let go of the ‘shoulds’ and be the author of their own life story because if you don’t tell your story, someone else will. She believes that: Your mindset, NOT your circumstance, makes all the difference in your happiness and success.
We asked Amy a few questions to get to know her approach to life & coaching:
Q: What were some childhood moments that shaped you into who you are today?
A: My amazing parents immigrated to the U.S. over 41 years ago with a suitcase each and speaking only a few words of English. They left my sisters behind with my grandparents until they could get their feet grounded and a life set up for us in America. They learned to adapt and survive in a country that looked at them as cheap labor, would threaten to take away their jobs if they ‘misbehaved’ and would mock their name, appearance and accent at every opportunity.
My parents learned survival strategies. They learned to ‘not rock the boat’, to keep quiet and keep your head down low. They believed that it was better to not be seen or heard. Just work hard and follow the rules.
They passed these beliefs on to me. While these learnings may have served my parents and all those in their generation, they don’t serve me or the AAPI community any longer.
I quickly learned that in the Western World that we live in, this mindset of expecting to be seen and heard and valued by just working hard was actually holding me back.
My performance reviews would constantly come back with things like:
You need to speak up more
You need to promote your work
You need to lead from the front (apparently I was only leading from behind)
All this working hard and burning the midnight oil wasn't getting noticed.
And for the broader AAPI community, staying quiet and invisible no longer helps us in the America we want to thrive (and not just survive) in.
Though I am more vocal in speaking my truth these days, it is a continuous struggle to unlearn and let go of these deeply ingrained behaviors and beliefs. At the same time, knowing that this is what I need to do to make positive change for myself, my child and the broader AAPI community gives me strength to continue to speak up and use my voice.
Q: What is an object and/or phrase that symbolizes 2022 for you?
PRESENCE & PLAY
Reflecting upon 2021, the year seemed to just fly by. Near the end of the year, I felt like I was constantly sucked into 'doing' mode, on auto-pilot day-after-day, barely aware of life passing me by.
Entering 2022 and a new chapter (motherhood!), my intention is to focus on "being" versus "doing" (we're human beings after all, not human doings).
To...
Slow down
Be present
Rediscover play in every moment
Because I want to be a present and playful mother, wife and self. I want to make each moment count.
As Alan Watts says: “This is the real secret of life – to be completely engaged with what you are doing in the here and now. And instead of calling it work, realize it is play.”
Connect with Amy Yip on LinkedIn.
